


Chapter 3

by silentvoicescryingout



Series: Unwritten [1]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Angst, Angst and Fluff and Smut, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-09
Updated: 2021-03-09
Packaged: 2021-03-15 19:33:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,278
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29938317
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/silentvoicescryingout/pseuds/silentvoicescryingout
Summary: Sakura is hurting because she failed to overcome Death and Sasuke comforts her because she was the one that always breathed life into him.
Relationships: Haruno Sakura/Uchiha Sasuke
Series: Unwritten [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2201751
Kudos: 21





	Chapter 3

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first/original draft of Chapter 3 of my fic Unspoken. Save for a few minor changes/corrections, this is the original chapter as I first intended. I wrote it in the notes app on my phone during breaks from work, riding in the car running errands, etc lol. It is very similar to its final product, but instead of switching to Sakura's point of view, we are seeing the entire latter part of the chapter through Sasuke's eyes, hearing it in his voice.
> 
> I stumbled across it while cleaning out my phone and thought readers might like to see it! ALSO, I am almost finished with Chapter 9 of Unpsoken, it will hopefully be posted before next week <3

When the door to her apartment swung open, his muscles relaxed at the sight of her. It felt good to return and have someone to come back to. It was too late, and she should have been sleeping but Sasuke had to admit that for once he was glad his selfishness overran his good judgement. Seeing her was too good, and his life for so long had been bereft of good things.

She beckoned him in wordlessly, a smile taking her lips. It was when she threw her arms about his shoulders, and pushed her weight against him that he smelled the faint sent of alcohol on her breath.

“You’ve been drinking,” he murmured, reaching his hand up to catch her chin as she tried to kiss him.

“Not a lot,” she sighed, moving her face away from his grasp and nuzzling into his collarbone. It was rare that she was so forward and affectionate these days, but Sasuke always appreciated her warmth.

“I’ve only just opened the bottle, actually,” she continued, and her voice was clear, if a bit breathy, so he did not stop her from pressing her lips to his.

He kissed her deeply, but pulled away when she began tugging at his clothes.

“You should be sleeping,” he said, and she clicked her tongue before detaching herself and sweeping past him into the living room. He toes off his sandals and dropped his mission bag before joining her. “Why are you still awake?”

“I’m not tired,” she cradling a small cup of sake, staring into her lap as she took a dainty sip. “I’m sure you are, after your mission.”

“What’s the occasion?” he asked. When her eyes flitted up to look at him, he nodded toward the drink clutched to her chest.

Her gaze shifted away, and it seemed she was looking at something far away. Sakura mumbled, “Rough day at work,” before bringing her cup back to her lips.

Sasuke watched her quietly, noticing the shiftiness of her legs and the way she gripped her cup tightly with both hands. She did not take another drink as the silence settled over them, simply staring at the photos resting on the small table to his left.

Sasuke had known Sakura as a child, and despite years spent away as she grew, he had come to know her once again. So, he knew this kind of silence, and the far-away look on her face meant that there were many things she was leaving unsaid. And Sakura was never a woman to hold her tongue. 

“Sakura,” he spoke lowly, but his voice broke loud in the silence.

“Yes, Sasuke-kun?” she turned her face back toward him, but her gaze did not meet his.

“Do you,” he began, watching her as she suddenly stood and shuffled to her small cabinet, plucking another sake cup, “want to talk about it?”

“No, Sasuke-kun,” she laughed, and it sounded fake, leaving a bitter taste at the back of his tongue. “If you’re not sleepy, you can have a drink with me, though.”

“I’ll pass,” he replied. She crossed over to where he was sitting, sidling up close to his side and placed the cup in his hands anyway.

“Come on,” she urged, biting her lip for a moment before meeting his eyes. “Just one. It’s depressing to drink alone, you know.”

“You would have been doing that if I hadn’t come by,” he noted, but held his cup out because the tone of her voice was hard enough to resist without the feel of her pressed against him.

She poured for him, before claiming her own drink again. “Good thing you showed up, then.”

She drank it faster this time, finishing it in one swallow and setting it back down.

He took a small sip. She gave him a pointed look, and he rolled his eyes before finishing it and setting the empty cup down beside hers.

“Satisfied?” he questioned, catching her gaze.

“Nearly,” she said quietly, languidly swinging her leg over his and settling herself in his lap.

Their lips met slowly, and he wrapped an arm around her waist, pressing her close to his chest. He tried to soak in the feeling of her embrace, but quickly found her hands slipping beneath his shirt and her hips rolling against him tantalizingly. 

She tasted of sake and something else, and when she broke away to reach for the hem of her sleeping gown, he watched her carefully.

She bared herself to him, sitting before him in nothing but her underwear, but reached back for her cup and bottle of sake. She took her second drink quickly as he looked on.

“Do you want to tell me why we’re really drinking?” he asked as she poured another.

She shrugged, “Technically, I am the one drinking. You only took one.”

“Aa,” he murmured. “Because you still haven’t told me exactly what we’re drinking for.”

He knew that she was too much of a heavyweight for three cups of sake to cause her fingers to tremble as they did.

“I did tell you,” she muttered, tipping her drink back before falling back into his chest, stroking her hands over his shoulders. A tempting smiled played at her lips, but did not reach her eyes. “Rough day.”

“Why?” It was the only thing he could get out before her lips were on his again. He pulled away before he could lose himself, meeting her disgruntled stare with a raised brow. She scoffed, sitting up straight.

“I lost a patient,” her voice was cold, a stark difference to the warm, liquid-like tone she was speaking to him with before. 

“I’m sorry,” he responded, a frown taking his face. 

“Don’t,” she said, her tone hard. She shut her eyes for a moment before her shoulders relaxed and she exhaled deeply. “Don’t be sorry.”

“Do you want to talk about it?” Sasuke takes his fingers through her hair, a tightness building in his chest as she shook her head slowly.

“No,” she whispered, and then she was pressed against him again, soft and supple against his torso. “Talking is the last thing I want to do.”

Before he could muster a reply, Sakura captured his lips again, this time tugging at his shirt aggressively, sliding her tongue deep into his mouth. Sasuke was concerned, but it was easy to become lost in her as she rocked against him intimately and tugged at his hair.

She had no want for words, and Sasuke was never any good at them. And there was a desperation in the way she touched him, and Sasuke knew the type of comfort she was seeking in that moment could not be verbalized anyway.

Sasuke understood. He knew how loss felt, how it felt to left empty and how the world would seem to lack warmth. He hated the thought of Sakura, who was like the personification of warmth and fullness, suffering through that cold. 

So he wrapped his lone arm around her tightly, pressing her closer as she took her comfort from his mouth, reached for it by the fingers she dug into his back. He let her pull away to rip his shirt off, tugging her back quickly against his bare chest, hoping that the warmth of his flesh would be enough to help chase away the chill of sadness and regret. 

When Sakura pulled away from their kiss with a gasp that rattled in her chest, he sought her neck with his lips. She sighed, and it sounded like relief, but held an undertone heartbreak.

“Sasuke-kun,” she breathed above his head. Her hands dropped to her lap, and she freed him from his pants with trembling hands.

He palmed her face as she rose to her knees, pressing his forehead to his as she pushed her underwear to the side and settled over him. A choked-off moan slipped from her lips as she lowered herself completely. 

Sasuke clasped her tight against him as she moved in his lap, her pace quickening and slowing interchangeably, as did her breaths as she groaned and hissed and cried out. 

She was chasing her pleasure, moving urgently and gripping his shoulders tight. He watched her face closely, her mouth gaping open at times. Sasuke’s attention was drawn to her crease between her brows, the tightness with which she shut her eyes. 

A long moan ripped from her chest as she found her release, her head thrown back and body shaking. Her pace did not falter as she slammed herself over him, leaning in to kiss him hungrily for a moment before pulling his head against her breast with a tug of his hair.

Sasuke laved at her soft flesh with his tongue, nipping at her peaks and sighing deeply as she rolled her hips desperately. Her gasps became shaky and her moans strained as she raced herself to the peak again. 

He caught her face and brought his up to take her lips, kissing her gently. He stroked his hand over her heated flesh languidly, wordlessly willing her to slow down and relax. 

Her movements stuttered before she sank into his lap, still rolling her hips and clutching at him as if she was hanging onto something by a thread and trying to seek purchase in the joining of their bodies. The pleasure of being so deep in her warmth was distant, his mind occupied with the trembling of her muscles, of her lips.

“Sasuke,” she whispered, her voice thick. “Please.”

Sasuke’s gripped his arm around her waist tightly as they rocked together, and it was only in a moment like this that he cursed Naruto for taking his second arm. Her mewls and gasps were sounding more and more like sobs, and for the first time Sasuke wished his soul brother had not left him lacking of a part with which he could hold Sakura better with.

He lifted her body and the sound she made at the separation speared him. He laid her on her back, settling back over her quickly, gently ridding her of her undergarment and pressing his fingers into her center. 

She cried out in relief as he brought her to completion with his hand, gripping his hair tightly. When she kissed him, he tasted salt as it ran down her face and over their lips.

Sasuke drank from her, her tears tasting of passion laced with the bitter notes of grief. He poured into her with his body, hoping to convey what he did not have words to say.

He breathed consolation into her mouth and kissed away the tears that gathered atop her closed eyelids. When she bucked her hips against his center, he sank into her and made love to her slowly, pressing deep and hoping it was enough to fill whatever emptiness she felt inside.

When he felt his end coming close, he moved to replace himself with his fingers, guiding her to climax again and again until her restless movements slowed and her body stilled, limp in his embrace.

The last moan of her last release ended in a choked sob. And when Sasuke placed a hand on Sakura’s flushed cheek, she peered at him with glossy eyes before sitting up abruptly and detangling herself from him.

She fumbled for her sake bottle, pouring a glass and gulping it down at breakneck speed before replenishing the glass with another. 

“Sakura,” he breathed. He placed his hand on her back hesitantly, body still tingling and mind reeling from her sudden change in demeanor.

Sakura cleared her throat, muttering “What,” in a stiff tone before she took another drink.

He watched helplessly as she refilled once again, “Maybe you should slow down.”

She laughed and he wondered if it tasted more bitter than the liquor against her tongue.

“You think I can’t hold my drink?” she asked, curling away from his touch. As if to prove her point, she refilled her cup again.

“Do you want to talk about what happened with your patient?” he urged gently, eyeing the curve of her spine as she hunched into herself.

“I told you,” she replied, her voice icy, “I don’t want to talk. I wanted to fuck, and we did that. You should probably go home and get some rest.” 

She turned to face him with both the same bottle and her cup clutched to her chest. Despite his stare, she didn’t meet his eyes as she continued pouring more drink.

“I’m not tired,” he watched her drink it down. Liquid dripped down her chin and she swiped it away with practiced steadiness, but he could see the alcohol taking its effect in her movements.

“Well, can’t do anything about that,” she quipped. “So unless you want to have another drink with me, or fuck again, I have nothing else to offer tonight, Sasuke-kun.”

The forced carelessness of her tone caused a frown to take his face and discomfort to sit like a rock in his stomach. When he only stared at her in response to her proposition, she scoffed and finished whatever was left in her cup before setting it down heavily on the table. Her face was flushed as she rested her forehead unsteadily in her hand.

“You can talk to me,” Sasuke spoke gently, resisting the urge to reach out and pull Sakura back into his arms.

Her expression was shuttered and she did not raise her eyes to his. 

“I don’t know what you want me to say,” Sakura responded after a long moment. Her words were slower, but not quite slurred.

“Just... talk to me,” Sasuke responded, tense. 

He knew Sakura to be open about her emotions, talkative. This Sakura was closed off and he had no idea how she had built these walls with sex and sake, much less how to surpass them.

“What? You want me to say I failed?” she asked, straightening suddenly to look at him. Her voice sounded tight, like she was trying to keep it from shaking.

“You didn’t fail,” Sasuke started, but was quickly cut off by Sakura barking a laugh that once again held no mirth.

“Someone dying in my care is nearly a text-book example of failure,” she scoffed. 

Sasuke shook his head, insisting, “No one is perfect, and sometimes people cannot be saved.”

Sakura visibly grit her teeth and pinned him with a stare. Her hair was wild and her cheeks flushed. Her nostrils flared in what looked like anger, but the pain in her reddened eyes showed the truth of what she was feeling. 

“I cannot afford to be imperfect, Sasuke,” he tried not to flinch at the lack of honorific. “People... they put their lives in my hands. I’m supposed to fix them. I’m supposed to make sure they make it home. This patient... she was too young to die. It was one of those missions that shouldn’t have even gone wrong! And she was broken in a way I should have been able to... to fucking fix but I wasn’t. Now her family is left without their child, and a team of genin without their teammate. And that is the worst kind of pain and it’s my fault.”

Sasuke ignored the way her words stung in a specific way, instead rushing to say, “It’s not your fault.”

He watched her face crumble as she clutched at her own arms, her head hanging low.

“It is my fault,” she whispered. “I’ve healed worse injuries. I’ve brought people back from the brink of death, shinobi, civilian. I tried everything, but it was... it was too late. I should have been faster, I should have tried using my seal but.... I didn’t, and then she was gone. So young...”

Sasuke reached over to halt Sakura’s movements as she reached for the sake again. She shrank away like his touch burned, and he tried to ignore the sharp pain in his chest.

“Sakura,” he spoke softly, trying his best to catch her gaze. “You did the best you could. She was young, but she was a shinobi. She was willing to give her life for her village, as we all are.”

“Shinobi children are still fucking children,” Sakura spit out. “Life is short enough as it is for us. But she was a baby. And we are supposed to be at peace. And it was my job to save her, to make sure she’d live to become a full-fledged shinobi. And I failed.”

Her voice had risen steadily as she spoke, before breaking into a broken whisper with the last of her words. Suddenly, she looked so small, curled up and naked in the middle of her living room floor. Her voice sounded small, too, and he  _ hated _ the way she shrank in the shadow of her self-imposed expectations.

“It is a tragic loss,” Sasuke said. He hesitated, trying to choose his words carefully. “You’re the best medic in all five nations. If you weren’t able to save this girl, that means no one could have. You gave her the best chance she could have had.”

“I gave her nothing,” Sakura snapped, her words slurred with drink and pain. She clutched her chest. “She isn’t the first patient I’ve lost. I know it comes with the job, with being a shinobi but... sometimes I feel like the only thing I’m good at is losing people.”

Sasuke felt wretched as her words hit him. He swallowed, moving close to look at her dejected face.

He opened his mouth to speak once she met his eyes, but Sakura cut him off briskly, “Sasuke-kun, just go home. I just need to... sleep it off. I always take it hard when I can’t save a patient, but... you don’t need to worry about it. I’ll be okay.”

She tried to smile reassuringly, but it looked more like a grimace. He shook his head, refusing to look away from her eyes. 

“I’m not leaving,” he said quietly, and before she could protest he pulled her back into his lap, locking his only arm around her waist.

“Sasuke-kun,” she pushed against his chest. “Why?” she sniffed when he refused to let go.

“Because you never left me,” he whispered, “and because I don’t want you to suffer alone.” 

He saw her hands flex by her sides before she reached for him, clutching his shoulders as her body shook in a tragic mockery of its pleasured rattling before. Her pain was tangible, bitter like poison in the back of his throat, curdling in his stomach as he failed to find something, anything to say to soothe her.

All he could do was tighten his grip about her as the first sob ripped from her chest, a painful, terrible sound that made his own eyes burn intensely. The damn was broken and she was choking on her own breath as cries spilled from her throat, wailing her loss and sadness and frustrations into his ear. Hot tears were pooling in his collarbone and trickling down his chest and he cursed the gods he hardly believed in that they allowed such wonderful people to endure such misfortune. Perhaps one day he would seek them out, confront them with the same reckoning he once did the Rabbit Goddess, punish them for their unfair allotment of pain and tragedy, but right now he had a more important job, a more precious thing to tend to. 

And so he clutched her as close as he could, rocking gently back and forth in a way he could just barely remember his mother doing until her cries turned hoarse and her body slumped against his in exhaustion. 


End file.
